25 Day Reset, Blogging and Networking

#25dayreset – DAY 1

Thank you Dinah Liversidge for connecting me to Abigail Barnes and persuading me to embark on the 25 Day Group Reset Program (#25dayreset)

As is my way I am embarking a day late , so already behind and trying to play catchup.  But.  I forgive myself!

I am floundering.  Sometimes my floundering becomes overwhelming.  All my ideas feel half baked; all my actions seem to not quite get off the ground.  I have part lists, long lists, notes, sub lists that once written I forget to refer back to…

I have mind maps and thoughts and don’t know how to collate them into a manageable plan of action.

I love this from the introduction The Knowledge , Action, Accountability triangle.  I seem to accumulate the knowledge and fail to put it into action.  Or begin to put it into action but fail to follow through.  eg: I know I’m a great teacher.  I have a studio, I have a website, I have a workshop program… but I have failed to promote it and gain bookings.  I’m afraid the same will happen with my other ventures, celebrant memorials , vow renewal packages.  Its like a self prophesying cycle… learn, enthuse, start setting up, never deliver.

Is it imposter syndrome?  Is it the fear of failure?  Or ability? Is it lack of focus?

I personally think my main problem is fear of tech, too many options, not engaging with the right ones, not knowing where to start.

I have a wonderful friend, mentor , teacher, coach,  Dinah liversidge, No Box Thinker.  She is inspirational, motivational and so very very very focused.  She has an idea, she develops it, she delivers it, seemingly with a fluidity and natural ability , like a swan gliding on the water.  She thinks it, she researches it, she actions it, it exists, its discovered by the potential market and it takes off.  She remembers EVERYTHING.  She has systems in place that get her from A to Z. To me its like alchemy, she’s a white witch and it’s all mysterious and magical and I want it but its always just out of my grasp.

Her story is amazing.  I can’t wait for her book.

Then I met, thanks to Dinah, Abigail Barnes and I am embarking on her 25 day reset program.  Its a group activity in that you share your progress , acheivements and concerns with a group of people , also on the program… the sharing makes me accountable and maintains my focus.  that’s the theory.

I am on the first step  Day one.  I’ve watched the introduction video (twice), I’ve worked through the first pages of the workbook and I have my two goals.  The trick now is to get past my sticking point… create a system, make it work, get a result.  Funnily enough my business goal is exactly that!

So here we are.  Day 1

Goal 1: Be Kind to ME

Interesting one.  I thought that allowing myself to hang out in my dressing gown all day and not do my hair was me being kind to myself.  Ive decided its not.  Its me ignoring myself!.  So

to action this :

  1. set an alarm for each morning – i must accept i am rarely a leap out of bed type of person, so set the alarm and give myself time
  2. get up , shower and moisterise myself, put on clothes that I would not be embarrassed to open the front door in!- i have really really neglected my personal care
  3. have a cuppa with hubby, check social media for half an hour NOT half the morning!
  4. use Dinahs time blocking idea…to give myself time.I have so many different hats ( i garden in 6 locations some weekly , some fortnightly, some morning/some afternoon; I run a guesthouse; sometimes guests are arriving or leaving, ironing needs doing, cleaning, shopping (for us and guests); our garden is important part of the business, its also my sanity;  I cover in the local shop, this is adhoc; I have stained glass commissions; I need to promote and deliver stained glass workshops; I am mid a massive stained glass community project, i need to fit it in and get back to group sessions; I’m a trained celebrant – the website needs finishing; i need marketing material; i need a system; i need clients… and the list is endless and overwhelming.. i need time for my friends, time for my family , time for me, time for my cat!)
  5. look in a damned mirror – the amount of time i relalise i’ve not looked at myself, or I have looked at myself but I’ve not SEEN myself.. look in the mirror in the morning, say something NICE!… and tidy my hair – for christs sake its like a straw bale thats fallen off a lorry and been hit by a truck!
  6. and as in the tenants of Abigail Barnes, MYOBW (Mind Your Own Bees Wax) – i must stop trying to worry about the whole world!

Goal 2: Get Some Structure

The eternal and underlying issue of my life, my sense of never quite getting there; the potential never realised, the opportunites never capitalised on.  The self prophesising of a sense of unworthiness.  But let’s find a calendar/notes/diary/reminder system that works for me.  Let’s invest (if I have to) in the right bit of tech that allows me to centralise a system that helps me regain (or simply, gain) control over my time and my ability to acheive.

  • research options
  • pick one
  • get some training if necessary (pay for it!)
  • impliment it
  • stop being caught in the centre of the storm where you are terrified to implimement it and getting nothing finished because of it.
  • set it up, use it, embrace it

I plan to blog an update daily, not something long and clever , just like an on line diary post and a reminder to myself to be ACCOUNTABLE

See you tomorrow at 8pm (ish)



(2) Comments

  1. Berni thank you, what a wonderful and honest post (as always from you).
    I must confess I am thrilled by the way you describe me, although also slightly amused and embarrassed. I am glad I inspire you, and I am delighted to have created, over my almost forty years of working, some systems that allow me to get a lot of things I love, done. It is not simple, and I promise here are days when it crashes down around me. I am still learning to be okay about those days. I love that you have joined me on Abigail’s amazing programme- I find her inspiring and she helps me lift my game. Love you my friend. Dxxx

    1. Berni Benton says:

      i speak as i find. Wear my heart on my sleeve. You ARE that inspirational person xxxx

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