Celebrant Views

12 handy tips to help you write your vows

handfasting ribbons your ceremonyWriting vows can be a tricky business but it shouldn’t be.  I’m going to share 12 handy tips to help you write your vows. With the right celebrant by your side, creating vows and promises that reflect your relationship, your personalities and are expressed with the right tone, should be fun, relatively easy and extremely rewarding.  With the right celebrant writing you a personalised service that truly represents the two of you, you can be assured of receiving the best support to find the right words and the best way to express them.

Some people, love to write pros and express their emotions.  They are happy to talk about matters of the heart.  They find it easy to let their love flow in a flurry of romantic  prose.

Some people, like me, don’t mind standing up in front of a crowd and speaking.  Hence my choice of career as a wedding and funeral officiant, and my role within the community as commentator and MC at our unusual events, Man v Horse, Bog Snorkelling etc.

Sadly, some people won’t consider getting married for fear of having to stand up and speak.  Or read (not everyone can) or write down how they feel.  For some the idea, prevents them doing something they would absolutely love to do, and that is to marry the love of their life.

Most people are not some people, they will lie somewhere between.

The good thing about us independent celebrants is that we are a dab hand at finding work arounds.

Here are 12 handy tips to help you write your vows.

Here are 6 handy tips:

you can just have vows that are read to you as ‘do you’ and you only have to say ‘I do’

  you could even have your vows as ‘do you’ and both reply together with ‘we do’ and avoid speaking out loud alone altogether

You can have repeat after me styled vows

❣ your celebrant can create you vows that are unique to your relationship.  

❣ instead of writing vows you can use a poem of the lyrics of a song that resonates with you 

you can tell your story to your celebrant and ask her to help you draft vows for you to read

If you do want to write vows yourself…

Here’s 6 more handy tips to help you

❣ decide together if you want your vows to feel traditional? or romantic? or involve a bit of humour?

❣ if you are making vows/ promises, keep it to 6 max, and if you want to include humour only include 1 or 2 eg: ” I promise to always bring you a cup of tea in bed”

❣ close your eyes.  Where do you imagine your relationship in the next 2 years, 20 year?

❣ close them again.  How do you see yourself growing old together?

❣  and again.  what 6 words come to mind when you think of your partner?

❣  tell your celebrant your answers, either in writing, by recording your  thoughts or in a private meeting or phone call and she/he will help you pull it all together


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